Diary Entry-I’m coming for you, Sassy!

It’s not easy to tell people about what I’m doing. They know weird runs in our family. But, telling anyone you’re going on a vision quest involving a search for Sasquatch is still going to raise an eyebrow or three.

It also tends to garner weird looks, guffaws, insults, and a variety of other indicators of ‘skepticism’. I have been on the receiving end of all the aforementioned and more. But, this is nothing new, really.

The Cohens blaze trails and uncover all that is weird in this world. It’s what we do. It’s who we are. We’re used to getting weird looks. Getting ridiculed is nothing new for us.

I’m proud to be a card carrying member of the Cohen clan. But, I haven’t always known where I fit in. Mom and Jess have the ‘buzz’. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a bit jealous. Both of them tell me the gift takes a toll, but I would still love to commune with the undead. Who wouldn’t?

I watched Poltergeist obsessively after Mom introduced me to it when I was about 8. I give her no shortage of shit for her questionable decision on this one. But, the die was cast. The Shining was on my bedside table about a week after I saw Poltergeist.

I spent most of my childhood neck deep in all things supernatural, ghostly, and undead. Jess dug all this creepy stuff too. We spent countless weekends awash in it.

Mom waited a few years before she told me about her ‘gift’. It was another few years before I learned Jess had it too. I always hoped I would get it. But, sadly the buzz never materialized for me.

Mom explained how it typically works. Most men don’t have it. More often than not it comes from the mother’s side.

Dad doesn’t have the buzz either. But, Dad is a prolific writer of best selling books (fiction and nonfiction) about almost every cryptid known to man. He may not have the buzz, but he’s got a gift of his own. I’m not really sure what the hell my gift is.

I thought four years of college would give me some perspective. I thought it would help provide clarity. I thought wrong.

Don’t get me wrong. I loved college. I explored EVERYTHING. I generally liked everything. But, I couldn’t quite find anything that called to me.

Some clarity came during a run. Running is one of the best catalysts for clarity I know. Sometimes, it just takes a few miles. Sometimes, a change of scenery is all that’s needed.

I headed out onto the trails at Huddart Park in the middle of the day on a random Wednesday. I wanted the feeling of being completely alone while I was out there. I wanted to lose myself in the trails.

It only took a few steps into woods and onto the trails  before I started to lose myself. I found the flow.

The countless random thoughts, questions, doubts, and anxieties began to fade. It was what I sorely needed. My mind was quiet, but not for long.

I rounded a turn drenched in dark shadows and promptly tweaked my ankle. I shouted a few expletives. I hobbled around for a few steps and took in a few deep breaths. It wasn’t broken. It was likely a slight sprain.

I glanced over towards the dark shadows to get a better idea of what had derailed me. The shadows were so dark, I flipped on the flashlight on my iPhone to illuminate the area. I took a few slow steps towards the darkness.

There it was. Carved deeply into a muddy spot on the side of the trail. It was the biggest F’ING footprint I have ever seen.

It was easily 16-18 inches long. If the footprint belonged to a human, it was a human unlike any other. My mind immediately gravitated towards everyone’s favorite, furry cryptid. Was this the footprint of a Sasquatch?

I took a few pictures of the print and hobbled back home. I sent the pics to Dad as I hobbled. He responded with skepticism. But, Sasquatch (oddly) has never been of any real interest to him.

Virtually every other cryptid under the sun has piqued his curiosity. But, he’s always steered clear of Sassy. I’ve never really understood why. That’s when it hit me.

Sassy could be MY thing! There have been so many alleged incidents, sightings, and encounters in Northern California. Enter The Great Sasquatch Road Trip!

I’m venturing North and diving deep into all things SQUATCHY! Surely, I’ll uncover something. No matter what, I’ll have one hell of an adventure.

Who knows? Maybe I could uncover definitive proof of Sassy’s existence. I’d carve out my niche in the Cohen clan as the greatest squatchologist ever!

Look out, Sassy. Tommy’s coming for you!